There have been some misunderstandings lately, so I would like to clear a few things up:
1. Bob is not gay. I know some of you think that he carries a purse and we're married for appearances. I know that there has been some gossip going around at work, but it's not true. Bob is straight, I think that I would know!
2. We are not cruel dog owners. Sometimes the most dire of circumstances requires us to use force on our dogs (kicking, spitting, name-calling). Don't judge us, we're smarter than you!
3. Storing human waste and yard clippings in a giant barrel and then leaving it for the next owners of your house is not cool. Don't do it. It's disgusting. We will hate you for it.
4. 40DDD bras make nice hats. Especially yellow ones. This isn't really a misunderstanding, just an awesome factoid.
As you can see, we've had an interesting week and hopefully we'll see more of these things.
Thank you for your time.